With the days noticeably shortening as we near the winter solstice, I have to admit it: I feel a little messed up.
I’m doing all the self-care-y things that the Wellness Industrial Complex is telling me to do: I drink water. I meditate. I sleep 8 hours a night (I’m fortunate, I know).
And yet: I feel cloudy and lethargic. I’m hyperaware of the sensations emanating from my throat, wondering if the dryness is dehydration or something worse: Covid? The flu? That other @*&#ing virus?!?!!
I chug some more water.
We can try to rebrand “neurotic” as “quirky and cute” – or as one of my students said, “neurotic is another word for self-aware”. But at some point, we need a little relief from ourselves.
Practice can be a source of that relief – maybe not always in the sense that we wake up from savasana feeling fresh and clear, but perhaps in the acknowledgement that we are sometimes groggy, grumpy, or in a funk. The acceptance is the relief, and it’s not defeat – it’s just OK.
Cap off this year by making a commitment to practice: get the online library of yoga classes, or explore a seated practice through an online course. The end of the year can be a mix of emotions for some of us; may these practices offer support in cultivating stability and a sense of release.
Even when standing in shadow, may we learn to turn ourselves towards the light.